Abigail Adams to Mercy Otis Warren, 5 December 1773
Boston December 5. 1773
My Dear Mrs. Warren
Do not my Worthy Friend tax me with either Breach of promise; or neglect towards you, the only reason why I did not write to you immediately upon your leaving Town, was my being seized with a Fever which has confined [me] almost ever since, I have not for these many years known so severe a fit of Sickness.
I am now thro– the favour of Heaven so far restored as to be able to leave my chamber some part of the Day. I will not make any other apology for my past neglect being fully sensible that I alone have been the Sufferer. My pen which I once Loved and delighted in; has for a long time been out of credit with me. Could I borrow the powers and faculties of my much valued Friend, I should then hope to use it with advantage to my self and delight to others.
Incorrect and unpolished as it is I will not suffer a mistaken pride so far to lead me astray as to omit the present opportunity of improvement, and should I prove a tractable Scholer, you will not find me tardy.
You Madam are so sincere a Lover of your Country, and so Hearty a mourner in all her misfortunes that it will greatly aggravate your anxiety to hear how much she is now oppressed and insulted. To you, who have so throughly look–d thro the Deeds of Men, and Develloped the Dark designs of a Rapatio [–s] Soul, 1 No action however base or sordid, no measure however Cruel and Villanous, will be matter of any Surprize.
The Tea that bainfull weed is arrived. Great and I hope Effectual opposition has been made to the landing of it. To the publick papers I must refer you for perticuliars. You will there find that the proceedings of our Citizens have been United, Spirited and firm. The flame is kindled and like Lightning it catches from Soul to Soul. Great will be the devastation if not timely quenched or allayed by some more Lenient Measures. 2
Altho the mind is shocked at the Thought of sheding Humane Blood, more Especially the Blood of our Countrymen, and a civil War is of all Wars, the most dreadfull Such is the present Spirit that prevails, that if once they are made desperate Many, very Many of our Heroes will spend their lives in the cause, With the Speach of Cato in their Mouths, –What a pitty it is, that we can dye but once to save our Country.–
–Tender plants must bend but when a Goverment is grown to Strength like some old oak rough with its armed bark, it yealds not to the tug, but only Nods and turns to sullen State.–
Such is the present Situation of affairs that I tremble when I think what may be the direfull concequences–and in this Town must the Scene of action lay. My Heart beats at every Whistle I hear, and I dare not openly express half my fears.–Eternal Reproach and Ignominy be the portion of all those who have been instrumental in bringing these fears upon me. There was a Report prevaild that to morrow there will be an attempt to Land this weed of Slavery. I will then write further till then my worthy Friend adieu.