Abigail Adams to Mary Smith Cranch, December 9, 1784

< , Start deletion, Auetuel , End, > Auteuil 1 December 9. 1784

My dear Sister

Your Letter by way of Amsterdam 2 had a quick passage and was matter of great pleasure to me. I thank you for all your kind and Friendly communications, by which you carry my imagination back to my Friends and acquaintance; who were never dearer to me than they now are, tho distanced so far from them.

I have really commiserated the unhappy Refugees more than ever, and think no severer punishment need to be inflicted upon any mortals than that of banishment from their Country and Friends. Were it my case, I should pray for death and oblivion. The consolations which Bolingbrooke 3 comforted himself with would afford me little Satisfaction, for tho the Same Heavens were Spread over me, and the Same Sun enlightned me; I should See the Heavens coverd with darkness and the Sun bereft of its Splendour.

We reside here at this village 4. miles distant from Paris. It is a very agreable summer situation but in winter I should prefer Paris on many accounts, but upon none more than that of Society. The Americans who are in France and with whom I have any acquaintance all reside in Paris. They would frequently fall in and spend an Evening with us. But to come 4 miles unless by particular invitation is what they do not think of, so that our Evenings which are very long, are wholly by ourselves. You cannot wonder that we all long for the Social Friends whom we left in America, whose places are not to be supplied in Europe. I wish our worthy and Sensible Parson could visit us as he used to in America, his Society would be very precious to us here.

I go into Paris sometimes to the plays of which I am very fond, but I So severely pay for it, that I refrain many times upon account of my Health. It never fails giving me a severe Headack, and that in proportion as the House is thin or crowded, one 2 or 3 days after < , Start deletion, I suffer , End, >. We make it a pretty general rule to entertain company once a week, (I do not call a transient Friend or acquaintance dining, by that Name). Upon those occasions our company consists of 15 18 or 20, which commonly costs us as many guineys as there are persons. You will naturely be surprizd at this as I was when I first experienced it, but my weekly Bills all of which pass through my Hands and are pay’d by me; convince me of it. Every American who comes into Paris, no matter from what State, makes his visit and pays his respects to the American ministers, all of whom in return you must dine. Then there is the foreign ministers from the different Courts who reside here and some French Gentlemen. In short there is no end of expences which a person in a publick Character is obliged to be at. Yet our Countrymen think their ministers are growing rich: believe me my dear Sister I am more anxious for my Situation than I was before I came abroad. I then hoped that my Friend in his advanced years would have been able to have laid up a little without toiling perpetually, and had I been with him from the first, he would have done it, when the allowence of Congress was more liberal than it now is. But cutting of 500 [ , Start insertion, guineas , End, ] at one blow, and at the same time encreasing our expences by removeing us from place to place is more than we are able to cope with, and I see no prospect but we must be loosers at the end of the year. We are now cleverly sittuated, I have got a Set of Servants as good as I can expect to find, Such as I am pretty well satisfied with. But I apprehend in the Month of Janry that we shall be obliged to give up our House dismiss our servants and make a journey to England. This is not yet fully agreed upon but I suppose the next Letters from the court of England will determine it, and this has been Mr. Adams’es destiny ever since he came abroad. 4 His Health which has sufferd greatly in the repeated attacks of the fevers he has had, obliges him to live out of cities. You cannot procure Genteel Lodgings in Paris under 25 and 30 Guineys a month, which is much dearer than we give for this House, besides the comfort of having your family to yourself. When I Speak of 25 and 30 Guineys per month not a mouthfull of food is included.

I have too little exercise here which I find the want of. My domestick buisness is so different and my family cares so lessned that unless I ride I have no excersise. The Cooks department relieves me from every care of that kind, and cleaning house is performd by Men Servants so that poor Esther has really had a fit of sickness lately merely for want of due excercise. After she came to Auteuel she grew very fat and enjoy’d the best Health that she ever had, but got herself so croweded in concequence of it, that She was seized with a pleurisy. But she is recovering now and I will make her contrive some way to prevent the like again from the Same cause; She is perfectly contented and happy. 5

As to Speaking French I make but little progress in that, but I have accquired much more facility in reading it. My acquaintance with French Ladies is very small. The Marquise Fayette 6 was in the Coun­ try when I first came and continued out untill November. Immediately upon her comeing into Paris I calld and paid my compliments to her. She is a very agreeable Lady, speaks english tollerably easy. We sent our servant as is the custom with our Names into the House to inquire if she was at Home. We were informd that she was not. The Carriage was just turning from the Door when a servant came running out to inform us that Madam would be glad to see us, upon which Mr. A carried me in and introduced me. The Marquise met me at the door, and with the freedom of an old acquaintance and the Rapture peculiar to the Ladies of this Nation caught me by the hand and gave me a salute upon each cheek, most heartily rejoiced to see me. You would have supposed I had been some long absent Friend, whom she dearly loved. She presented me to her Mother and sister who were present with her, all setting together in her bed room quite in the family way, one of the Ladies was knitting. The Marquise herself was in a chintz polinee. She is a middle siezd Lady Sprightly and agreeable, professes herself strongly attached to Americans. She supports an amiable Character, is fond of her Children; and very attentive to them, which is not the General Character of Ladies of high rank in Europe. In a few days she returnd my visit, upon which we sent her a Card of invitation to dine. She came, we had a large company. There is not a Lady in our Country who would have gone abroad to have dined so little drest, and one of our fine American Ladies who sat by me whisperd me; good Heavens! how awfully she is drest. I could not forbear returning the whisper which I most sincerely despised, by replieing the Lady’s rank sets her above the little formalities of dress: she had on a brown flowence gown and peticoat which is the only Silk except Sattins which are worn here in Winter, a plain double Gauze hankerchief a pretty cap with a white ribbon in it, and lookd very neat. The Rouge tis true was not so artfully laid on as upon the faces of the American Ladies who were present, whilst they were Glittering with diamond watch Chains girdle Buckles &c. The Marquise was no ways ruffled by her own different appearence. A real well bred French Lady has the most ease in her manners that you can possibly conceive of, it is studied by them as an Art, and they render it Nature. It requires some time you know, before any fashion quite new becomes familiar to us. The dress of the French laidies has the most taste and variety in it, of any I have yet seen, but these are topicks I must reserve for to amuse my young acquaintance 7 with. I have seen none however who carry the extravagance of dress to such a height as the Americans who are here, some of whom I have reason to think live at an expence double what is allowed to the American ministers. They must however abide the consequences.

Your Letters date Sepbr. I received, 8 one of which gave me pain and mortification, because it shewd a want of delicacy and Honour, where I wished to have found both. I did with it as you requested. If I had written immediately upon the receipt of it, I should have exprest myself with a warmth that I might afterwards have repented. Time has made me consider it, as an imprudent triumph over mortification, but if I had been here, well as I wish to think of . . . . and happy as I hope to see . . . . I should have prevented so explicit an answer. But you know, who never does any thing by halves. Any family unhappiness would Soon put a period to the days of a person whose warmth of passions are meliorated and Softned by time, whose Health is infirm and whose great publick exertions in the most hazardous times have batterd and impaired the fabrick. 9 Mr. Jefferson has been sick and confined to his house for six weeks. He is upon the recovery tho very weak and feeble. 10 Dr. Franklin is much afflicted with the Stone, which prevents his going abroad unless when the weather will permit him to Walk.